hen you work in healthcare, you are placed in a unique position when one of your coworkers is sick or injured: you may be the one caring for them. It can feel like caring for a family member or friend, and if that coworker passes away, the grief can be especially overwhelming.

Knowing how to respond to these situations and how to support each other is so important. From our experiences with grief, loss and caring for coworkers, this is what we have learned.

When you're the caregiver: know when to step away

When a coworker is admitted to the emergency room or hospital, it’s natural to want to help them or fix them. But for everyone’s emotional health, it’s vital to know when to step away. It’s important to remember:

• Though they are your coworker, their information and private and is protected by HIPAA. If you aren’t assigned to care for them, or performing functions required for your job, you should not access their information or discuss their care. If you are unsure whether access or activities fall within your role, contact the Privacy Office.
• If you are assigned to their care, and feel you are too emotionally involved in their outcomes, it may be best to ask to be excused from this responsibility.
• Trust their care to someone else on the team. Trust your fellow caregivers without hovering or trying to control care.

As a healthcare worker, you have an inclination to help. If you do want to help, try to find other ways to contribute. You could get food or water for family members. You could get a blanket for the patient or bring their favorite food.

Ask for—and Share—Resources to Help

The best strategy, and sometimes the hardest strategy for coping, is to ask for help and support when you need it. It’s not always easy to do and this is precisely why it does not reflect weakness. Rather, it demonstrates your strength and self-awareness. If you need to take a breather; if you need help managing your patient load; if you need grief counseling; the strongest thing you can do is ask for those supports that you need.

There are also resources within University of Utah Health to help, including:

• The Resiliency Center has messaging and information to help leaders support and speak to their team.
• The Employee Assistance Program offers free mental health counseling to employees.
• Spiritual resources through the chaplains and Spiritual Care Team.

Leaders should be transparent and share these resources with their employees and encourage them to use them. Leaders should also check in with their employees regularly, especially those who appear to be struggling.

Days, weeks and even months after the event, it’s important to connect with the people around you. Checking in can mean just being open to listening. You can start a conversation expressing that you are concerned and worried. Don’t put pressure on them to share, just reiterate you are available for them if they need you.

In the case of a loss, it is also helpful if leaders can make space and time for employees to take part in normal practices of grieving, such as attending a memorial service or viewing. Leaders can arrange for coverage or help organize groups to attend these events.

Having time to sit with each other and reminisce about the person lost can be very healing.

Transitioning coworkers back to work

Once they are recovered, your coworker will come back to work. They are not your patient anymore, and that can be a difficult shift in your relationship. They don’t want to be cared for anymore, so it’s important to give them respect and space. You need to recognize that if they are back at work, they are capable of caring for others.

But if they have been through trauma, it’s still important to check in on their emotional health in small ways. You can say something as simple as, “I’m glad to have you back, and I’m here if you need anything.” You can trust them to reach out for help if they need it.

Caring for patients can be emotionally difficult; caring for a patient who is also your coworker is much harder. We strongly encourage you to reach out for help when you need it and to take advantage of any resources you need to maintain your mental and emotional health.